My Big Fat Fairytale Wedding
by imhookedonaswan
Summary: After Emma and Killian get engaged, her parents insist on throwing the biggest wedding Storybrooke has ever seen
1. Dresses

My Big Fat Fairytale Wedding

"Tell me Swan how many people are we up to?" Killian asked as he leaned back in his chair and brought his fingers up to pinch the bridge of his nose.

"350," sighed Emma placing her forehead on the square inch of space left on the table in front of her. The table was littered with seating charts, swatches for table linens, invitation samples, and 3 different centerpiece arrangements, the rest of the loft littered with wedding magazines, more centerpieces, and photo albums full of different photographers' sample pictures. Emma and Killian never expected wedding planning to be this difficult when he proposed to her 2 months ago, but as soon as they told Emma's parents they insisted on having a large ceremony. Even though they had wanted something small, Emma complied since this was the one thing in her life that her parents would be able to experience with her.

"350? I'm pretty sure I don't even know 50 people in this town. Where are all these people from?" Killian exclaimed.

"Apparently they were all part of my parent's court back in the Enchanted Forest and when they saw our engagement announcement in the paper they called my mother who put them on our guest list. I'm pretty sure I don't know half of these people," Emma said picking her head up off the table. "Are you sure you're okay with having this huge wedding?"

"Love so long as I'm marrying you, I'll be the happiest man on earth," he smiled and placed his hand on her shoulder and kissed her forehead.

"Let's just take a break, if I have to look at one more invitation sample I will scream. Want to go to Granny's and get some lunch?" she asked him.

"That may be the best idea I've heard all day," Killian said standing up and stretching. Suddenly the front door burst open Ruby, Elsa, Snow and David all filing in.

"Oh good you're both here," said Snow unbuckling Neal out of his stroller. The lively toddler walked over the David's outstretched arms.

"Yeah but we were going to go to Granny's to get some lunch, what's up Mom?" asked Emma as she shrugged on her leather jacket.

"Oh Honey you can't go to Granny's right now," Snow said.

"What why?" Emma asked, she hadn't eaten all day and she was craving a grilled cheese and tomato soup.

"We have your bridal dress appointment today, we need to head over there right now," said Snow picking up some of the bridal magazines stacked haphazardly on a side table.

"But food," whined Emma, looking from her father to Killian to Elsa.

"Don't worry I'll bring you a grilled cheese and soup," Killian told her.

"Oh no you won't it's bad luck for the groom to see the dress before the wedding, plus we need to figure out what kind of suit you'll be wearing," said David clapping Killian on the shoulder.

"Now come on we don't want to be late," Snow said, grabbing Emma and kissing David on the cheek and Neal on the forehead. Emma turned and gave Killian her "my mom is out of her mind but we'll deal with it" look and followed her out the door.

The bridal store was bright and inviting as Emma, Snow, Ruby and Elsa walked in and greeted the bridal consultant. They were presented with some champagne and the tiniest sandwiches Emma had ever seen, but they would have to hold her over. The bridal consultant lead them over to a couch in order to talk to them about the wedding and what kind of dress Emma wanted.

"So where are you getting married?" the consultant named Rebecca asked.

"On the beach," Emma smiled remembering the spot Killian had proposed to her.

"And what kind of silhouettes and fabrics do you like and don't like?"

"I definitely want something a little more form fitting, nothing too heavy and absolutely nothing that has a really poofy bottom."

"And how do you feel about lace?"

"I'm not opposed to it, so long as I don't look like a doily," Emma laughed.

"And what about you, Mother of the Bride? What would you like to see her in?" Rebecca asked Snow White.

"I would at least like to see her try on one big princess dress," Snow said placing her hand on Emma's knee.

"Really?" Emma asked trying not to make a face. She may have worn a huge red ballgown when she and Killian crashed her father's and Princess Abigail's engagement ball but she could live without having to wear another one.

"Please humor me, Emma" Snow said and Emma smiled and agreed, what's the harm in just trying one on if it'll make her mom happy. They discussed budget and the consultant took Emma into the back to pick out a first batch of dresses to try on.

"So which one do you want to try on first? One that you really like or one that your mom would like to see?" Rebecca asked hanging up some of the dresses in the changing room.

"Let's try on a ballgown so that we just get it out of the way and then we can really focus on finding something we all like. Emma changed out of her jeans and leather jacket and Rebecca helped her get into the huge ballgown she had pulled. It had draping all around strapless sweetheart bodice and the skirt was covered in petals. Emma pulled the bodice up and marveled at how freaking heavy the dress was, her hips actually hurt with all the weight they had on them. Emma picked up the front of the skirt so she would be able to walk out to the podium so her mother and friends could see it.

"Oh Emma it's beautiful," Snow said as she stood up from the couch to get a closer look at Emma and the dress. Emma smiled as Snow circled her and looked at her in the mirror until she noticed that Snow was blinking back tears.

"Mom are you okay?" she asked as she reached for her mother's hand.

"Yes, yes happy tears I promise. You just look so beautiful, like the princess you could have been if this curse never happened," Snow said, her voice wavering. Emma felt herself get choked up and smiled at her mother, glad that she could give her mom at least this brief look at what her life could have been had they not been separated.

"So um what do you guys think about it?" Emma asked turning to Ruby and Elsa who were both seated on the couch.

"Your waist looks super tiny in this dress and it's absolutely beautiful on you," said Ruby wiping her eyes.

"I agree the dress is gorgeous but Emma is this what you want? How do you feel in this one?" asked Elsa as she sipped her champagne.

"I do feel really beautiful but it's just so heavy and all wrong for the beach. I feel like I have 10 pound weights on my hips," laughed Emma smoothing the front of her dress and looking apologetically at Snow but she smiled and patted Emma's hand and nodded before sitting back down on the couch.

Emma and Rebecca went back to the changing room to change Emma out of the gown and put her in some of the other dresses she had picked out. The next dress was a very simple silk mermaid gown that Ruby said made her butt look perfect but was overall a little too plain, another one was a very pretty drapey chiffon that was very light and airy but Emma felt like it made her look like she was trying to hide a nonexistent baby bump. Emma loved a lace mermaid dress with cap sleeves and an open back but Snow felt it was too revealing for a wedding.

"Well Mom, I'm 31 years old and I had a kid when I was 18, I'm not fooling anybody," Emma said.

"I know, but I just think a wedding should be about love and not the wedding night," said Snow who was obviously trying not to loose her patience. Emma held her tongue and turned to look back in the mirror. This was by far her favorite dress, it fit like a glove and made her feel beautiful and sexy and she wasn't going to lie she liked imagining the look on Killian's face when he saw her in it. But she also didn't want to get a dress that she knew her mother really didn't like.

"How about we try on the last dress and see how you feel?" suggested Rebecca trying to diffuse the tension. She lead Emma back to the changing room to try on the last dress, a silk A-line with a satin cummerbund around the waist. It was very simple and Emma had overlooked it but Rebecca had insisted she try it on, saying it was much more beautiful on. Emma stepped into the gown and Rebecca zipped her up and Emma turned to look at herself in the mirror and felt all her breath leave her chest. The gown was very simple but the skirt was so light and soft and the cummerbund cinching her waist made her look very elegant and romantic.

"So do you want to show them?" said Rebecca with a knowing smile on her face. Emma nodded, she felt speechless as she walked out to show her friends and her mother. Everyone gasped and Emma saw Snow's eyes well up again.

"Emma this is stunning on you!" Ruby said rising up off the couch followed by Elsa and Snow.

"And you look so happy in this one, you're glowing!" exclaimed Elsa looking at the dress up close. Emma turned to look at Snow.

"So what do you think of this one? Better than the ballgown?" Emma asked.

Snow smiled wide and cupped Emma's cheek in her hand, "It's definitely better, it's more you." Emma leaned down and hugged her mother tight trying to hold in the tears welling up behind her eyelids.

"Um excuse me but does this little cutie belong to someone?" a voice behind them asked. Everyone looked around to see a receptionist holding little Neal's hand who was holding what looked like a take out bag from Granny's.

"Neal what are you doing here?" Snow asked picking Neal up and balancing him against her hip.

"Killy told me to bring this to Emma," he said holding out the bag to his sister. Emma took it from him opening it to find a grilled cheese sandwich and tomato soup and a note from Killian.

"All finished at the tuxedo shop, hopefully you're enjoying yourself. I sent in the little one with sustenance and I was wondering if you would like to join me for dinner at the restaurant we had our first date in for a night without wedding talk. Just you and me, Swan. -Love, Killian"

Emma beamed at her note, she was marrying the biggest dork but he was her dork, she borrowed a pen and scribbled her response on the back of his note.

"I would love to, see you at 7. -Love, Emma"

She gave the note back to her adorable three year old brother who lead Snow out of the bridal shop and out to where Killian and David were standing.

"So Emma would you like to see a veil to give you a more complete picture?" asked Rebecca.

"Just a second, let my mom come back so she can see too," said Emma looking towards the front of the store. She spotted Snow coming back to the group.

"Do you think he saw anything?" asked Emma, surprising her self, she never cared about the superstition before but now she wanted Killian's first look of the dress to be when she's walking down the aisle.

"No, you're all the way back here and plus David made him wear a blindfold while they were standing out front," Snow laughed.

"Are you serious?" asked Ruby, Snow took out her phone and showed them all a picture of Killian with a scarf tied around his eyes making his best pouty face. Emma laughed looking at her fiancé, he truly was a huge dork.

"So Snow, would you like to see Emma in a veil before we make any final decisions today?" asked Rebecca.

"Of course!" Emma thought she had never seen her mother this happy as she placed a simple fingertip veil on top of her head and handing her a bouquet of flowers. Emma turned to look at herself in the full length mirror flanked by her mother and her bridesmaids and couldn't believe she had reached this point in her life. Only 5 years ago she was chasing down perps in Boston with no family and mile high emotional walls, and now she had a family, a home, and a man she loved and who loved her back with every part of his soul. She started nodding furiously.

"This is definitely the one, this is it," she said a wide smile spreading onto her face.

"Are you sure you aren't just saying that so you can eat your food?" Ruby joked and everyone laughed. Rebecca took Emma back to the fitting room to be measured so they could order her the right size and the change back into her own clothes.

Killian was right, so long as she was marrying him she would probably be the happiest woman on Earth.


	2. Invitations

Killian respected Snow White, she was a kind woman, a good leader, and inherently good. He was so grateful that she had seemed to accept him into her family and that he was good enough to love her daughter. But if he spent one more minute going over nearly identical wedding invitations with her he was going to flip the table over. He had no idea there were so many different shades of white (cream, eggshell, off white, pure white, etc) or so many different fancy loopy fonts to choose from. He wished Emma could be here at the loft to help pick out the invitations but she and David were at the Sheriff station and Snow had somehow wrangled him into coming to the loft to look at all the options for invitations.

"So what do you think of this option? It's nice and classic and it has a kind of nautical theme that goes with the wedding," said Snow showing him yet another invitation. Killian looked it over, it was white with a navy border around the sides and a picture of an anchor in the center.

"I actually quite like this one," he said handing the invitation back to her.

"Or what about this one? It's so elegant," she said as she trusted another invitation towards him, this one cream with black loopy script. Killian observed it, it was very fancy. Perhaps a little too elegant for his and Emma's wedding.

"I'm not to sure about this one, to be quite honest," he said scratching behind his ear.

"Why not?"

"It's just, ah, perhaps too fine for the kind of wedding Emma and I would like?" he said still scratching his ear nervously. If he was going to be completely honest, Snow White intimidated him. He knew he wasn't her first choice for a husband for her daughter.

"Oh there's no such thing as 'too fancy' when it comes to a royal wedding, even when it's on the beach," Snow White said taking back the invitation. Killian swallowed nervously, scratching the back of his ear. He knew that he should have suggested something more grand for his and Emma's wedding than the beach where he proposed to her. Emma was a princess after all, she deserved something extravagant and elegant.

"Killian are you alright? You look like there's something on your mind," asked Snow White looking at him with concern.

"Aye, I just need some water," he said as he rose from the table and strode into the kitchen, filling a glass of water from the faucet. What was he doing? Emma may love him but she was a princess, she had a title and he had nothing. He couldn't say he was a Lieutenant after he deserted the Navy to become a pirate, nor could he say he was a captain anymore since trading away the Jolly Roger for a bean. Was he even worthy of her?

"Killian, is there something bothering you?" Snow White asked him as she entered the kitchen. She looked at him with concern, eyebrows furrowed and eyes wide.

"No, not at all," he said setting his glass in the sink.

"You know Emma had to get her superpower from someone right? You can tell me whatever's bothering you, you're going to be an official part of the family soon and families talk to each other."

Killian looked at her, her green eyes matching Emma's and swallowed thickly, he took a breath.

"I sometimes get the feeling that I'm not your first choice for a son in law, that you wished Emma loved someone other than an old one handed pirate with a drinking problem," he said not looking into her eyes.

Snow walked towards him and put her hand on his shoulder, "I'm so sorry you feel that way, Killian. I'll be honest 3 years ago when you it was obvious that you and Emma had a connection I was not you're biggest fan. I thought that Neal and Emma were true love and that they could be a real family with Henry," Killian winced slightly, he had not thought about Baelfire in a long time.

"However, that was not my place to tell Emma who to love, especially when I didn't know the whole story of how he abandoned her and sent her to prison. I was also so naïve, to think that just because he was her first love that they would be true love. But seeing you and Emma together, seeing the way you two look at each other, your never ending support of her, the way you both broke down each other's walls, how could you not be my first choice for a son in law?"

"But I'm not even titled, Emma's a princess, she deserves someone with a title, not a disgraced ex-pirate."

"Emma doesn't give a damn if you're titled or not, she's marrying you because she loves you," Snow reassured him. A small smile crept onto his face, she was right of course, he was being stupid. Emma was raised in this world, she wasn't some spoiled princess who would only consider marrying princes, counts, and dukes. She loved him, pirate past and all. He was caught off guard when Snow drew him in for a hug, blanking for a second before wrapping his arms around her and returning the hug.

"I'm so glad that you are marrying my daughter," she said.

"Aye? Thank you Snow, and for saying all that."

"It's the truth, now how about we get back to trying to pick out some Save the Dates for Emma to look over?" she said releasing him from the hug.

"Save the Dates? I thought these were the invitations?" he asked incredulously.

"Oh no, Save the Dates are like a pre-invitation. We still have to pick out invitations after you and Emma decide on your Save the Dates," Snow explained.

"Bloody hell," Killian whispered to himself, running his hand through his hair as he walked back to the dining room table.


	3. A Cozy Night In

**AN: So this chapter was meant to be strictly fluff but turned into smut. If that's not your thing that's totally cool you don't need to read this chapter, just giving you a heads up!**

"It feels nice to have one night without wedding talk," Emma said as Killian handed her a steaming mug of hot cocoa and cinnamon. She settled into the sofa in their living room, drawing the thick blanket over her legs, and snuggled into her fiancé. They had been planning the monster of a wedding for 3 months now and it was nice to just have a cozy night in their little cottage by the docks together. Henry was spending the night at Regina and Robin's so they cracked open a nice bottle of wine to have with dinner, Emma feeling a content and tired limpness in her limbs. Killian had surprised her when she came home by somehow cleaning the cottage and getting all the various wedding samples and magazines out of sight.

"Want to see what's on Netflix?" he asked her leaning forward and grabbing the remote off the coffee table. Emma nodded, taking a sip of her cocoa.

"What are you in the mood for?"

"Something Christmas-y, it's the official start of the season after all," she said, "How about Home Alone, I haven't seen that one in forever."

"So I can relive that day Henry booby trapped Regina's office with marbles?" Killian joked.

"I forgot that happened! It seems like so long ago when that Snow Queen was running around Storybrooke,"

"Aye it has been a while since we had any ice related villains to chase after, I seem to remember our first date was chasing down a huge vicious snowman," Killian replied.

"Yeah, we have caught a lot of villains together," Emma said thoughtfully, "We're pretty badass." She felt Killian snort with laughter and started laughing along with him. They selected Home Alone and started to get comfortable to watch the movie when Emma suddenly remembered they just bought some popcorn and started to get up from the couch.

"Where are you going?" Killian asked her pausing the movie.

"I'm just going to grab some popcorn from the pantry," she said from the kitchen.

"Ah okay," Killian said sinking back into the sofa before inhaling sharply and looking around at her, "No wait Swan don't open the do-!" He was too late, Emma opened the door to the pantry only to have a small mountain of magazines, wedding invitations, center pieces, and sample pictures fall out on to the floor. Emma gaped at the mess, looked up at Killian and saw him hanging over the back of the couch with his hand outstretched gaping back at her. Emma looked back to the pile of wedding supplies and burst into laughter. She felt like she couldn't breath she was laughing so hard, she gripped her sides and sank onto the floor next to the pile of white. She heard Killian start to loose it too and looked back up at him.

"Oh my god" she laughed, "This is insane, this pile is nearly as big as I am!" she choked out, tears starting to well up in her eyes. Killian got up from the couch and sat down next to her, still laughing and tried to shove the small heap of wedding things back into the pantry.

"Why is it in the freaking _pantry?" _she asked him, helping him push it all back from where it came from.

"It's the only place it would all fit and be out of the way!" he said collapsing to the floor in another fit of laughter. Emma started laughing even harder and joined her pirate on the floor, snuggling herself into the crook of his arm.

"This wedding is going to be such a monster, just look at all the stuff we have to get through!" she said gesturing to the wedding stuff now falling out of the pantry. "Is this even worth it to go through with this big wedding?" she asked him.

"Of course it's worth it, I'll be marrying you in front of all our family and our friends... and about 200 people we don't know," he said wrapping his arm around her shoulders and bringing her closer to his chest.

"I'm really glad I'm marrying you, you know that?" she said playing with the buttons on his shirt.

"Aye, and I'm really glad I'm marrying you too," he replied kissing her hair. Emma tilted her chin up and kissed him properly, he stroked her face with his hand and wound her hair between his fingers. Emma tilted her head to deepen the kiss, sliding her tongue along the seam of his lips before he let her in, their tongues swirling together. Emma shifted so that she was straddling Killian her hands working to undo the buttons of his shirt and vest, Killian fisting his hand in her hair and kissing his way down her neck. Emma moaned softly as he began sucking and nibbling on the sensitive skin where her neck met her shoulder, rolling her hips against his, feeling heat pool deep in her belly. Killian removed his hand from her hair and he wrapped both arms around her torso, she could feel the cool steel of his hook through her sweater. She finished unbuttoning all his buttons and ran her hands up his torso to his shoulders pulling him up to a sitting position so she could push the shirt and vest off him.

"You wear things with way too many buttons," she said breathily. He chuckled softly pulling her sweater up over her head, pressing their bodies together.

"Is that better love?" he said kissing his way over her breasts. Emma could feel her nipples harden under her bra as he buried his face in the valley between them his hand making its way up her back to undo her bra. He took a nipple into his mouth flicking his tongue over the hard nub and pinching the other between two fingers. Emma threw her head back and rolled her hips against his again trying to find the friction she desperately needed. Killian groaned low in his throat, releasing her nipple to pay attention to the other one, his hook lightly scratching up and down the side of her body sending goosebumps all over her body. He shifted his hips and rolled them over so Emma was on her back, he reclaimed her lips with his pulling her bottom lip between his teeth. Emma moaned and ran her fingers through his hair and wrapped her legs around his waist, grinding herself against his hard length through their jeans. Killian toyed with the button of her jeans taking his time with unbuttoning them.

"Oh come on," Emma groaned against his lips.

"Impatient, aren't we Swan?" he said pulling away from her slightly and cocking an eyebrow at her. She rolled her eyes at him and dragged him back down to her scratching her nails down his back. Killian finally undid the fly to her jeans and slipped his hand in. She felt his callused fingers against her slick folds, rubbing small circles against her clit. Emma arched her back into him and dug her fingernails into his back, she needed more, she craved more. Killian tugged her jeans and panties off her and settled himself between her thighs, he bit and licked and nibbled at her inner thighs until Emma was practically begging him to provide her with some relief. He pressed his tongue to her center and pushed two fingers into her, curving them up so they hit that spot that made her see stars. Emma's hands found themselves in his hair pulling him closer to her, burying his head deeper between her legs getting closer and closer to release. She came hard, Killian lapping everything up and helping her to ride out her orgasm. He kissed his way softly back up her body, finishing with her lips. Emma could taste herself on his lips, she needed more. Her hand reached down between them, unfastening his belt and undoing his fly and pulling out his cock. Killian groaned against her lips as she began to stroke him, aligning himself with her entrance. He pushed into her, both of them moaning loudly as he began to fuck her into the kitchen floor. Her hands her all over the place; his face, his hair, his back, his biceps, and clutching his hand. She felt her orgasm building up again, her face buried in his neck, licking and sucking at the skin there before biting down on his collar as she felt herself tighten around him, murmuring his name as she came. His thrusts became more erratic and uncontrolled, his breathing heavy and he chased her lips with his. He came soon after with a short deep moans, kissing her deeply before pulling out of her. They laid there for a few minutes, panting and cuddling slightly, before Emma started to laugh slightly.

"What's so funny?" he asked, turning to look at her.

"We just had sex on a small mountain of wedding stuff on our kitchen floor," she chuckled running a hand though her hair. Killian laughed lightly, pulling her closer to him and kissing her forehead.

"Do you want to still make some popcorn and watch a movie?" she asked him, and felt him nod against the top of her head. They got up from the floor and redressed before popping their popcorn and settling back onto the couch to watch some Christmas movie and fall asleep tangled together on the couch.


End file.
